What am I? Author, single parent, pan-sapiosexual, widow, student, pagan-leaning failed Catholic who still tries occasionally just so I can get a guilt-fix, geek, Aspergers-feminazi-firebreather and owner of a quite ridiculous amount of animals. I’m not sure of the hierarchy of that list, so it’s just going to stay like that for now. I’ll probably add to it as I expand my characters.
Anything else? I have a day job that I’m contractually not allowed to write about (bloody Assassins’ Guilds and their petty rules…), I found my best friends on the internet, and I have a sneaking suspicion that I only started writing because I was going to start doing that stuff in real life if I didn’t, and I don’t do well in institutional environments.
I can read two novels a day, and my record time for pint-drinking is 4.6 seconds; I’m always up for a challenge to my throne, but you have to buy the round. I have a photographic memory that lets me impersonate an academic on occasions, although this isn’t always useful. It means I can grasp scientific concepts without too much of a headache and tell you how the date for Easter is worked out, but I still have no idea how you can draw at a cricket match, or how an endowment mortgage works. I also have to guess which way to turn a key to open a door. Every. Single. Time. I’m bloody amazing on a pub quiz team though, as long as you let me hold the pen.
And I like my humour like I like my coffee: black, bitter, and capable of stopping you sleeping at night. This counts as your warning.